She thinks I'm lost, she doesn't really know.

She asked me if I prayed and I said no. She said that when times are tough it's good to pray and that it's never too late to start praying. I didn't say anything to that, I have a hard time telling people that I love that I don't really believe in prayer. Most agnostics don't. I am not sure how I feel about the idea of God but if there is a God I'm pretty sure it wouldn't appreciate me starting to pray when times are tough in my life and then once everything is fine abandoning the idea again. That isn't me, if I ever choose to believe it wouldn't be because my mum has to have a biopsy, it would be because I would want to start believing.
I don't need the idea of God to sleep at night. I believe in people and in the strength of communities.
Once my mum goes for her biopsy then we will find out whether or not it's cancer. All I know is that regardless I will be there. I took her to a hospital in Toronto this week and I will continue to go to all appointments to support her.